Places in Polaroids #6

#6a - Berlin / inventors of the Sasomstag
#6b - Berlin / much love, such friendship

2016 has been full of fulfilling my wanderlust and I was traipsing around a lot of new countries and cities. Coming home has never been so sweet and short as this year. Each time, I was rarely adjusting and off I went again. I loved being away every second and I loved coming home. The roots I started to plant are growing and I am one lucky person to have patient roommates, patient friends and patient family who I somehow squeeze into the short time in the city. Maybe I'll stay a bit longer in Berlin next year... until wanderlust hits again.

2016 in Berlin was: hugging people, enjoying the homely feeling, Sasomstag, glitter, music, being out and about in the city, rubber boat birthday parties, calling Tempelhofer Feld my living room and connecting with people. 'Twas a very good year, Berlin. Thanks for the people, who inhabit you, and the homely feeling you offer me.

Summer in Berlin 2015

This summer. Enjoying the heat. Berlin has been pleasant this year. The heat lingered long and in the midth of december it is still warm. It has been months of new encounters and projects, good byes and decisions. Not the easiest time, but lessons learned.

I had to learn to pause again.

There was this aching pain in my shoulder. This and my skin worsening are a sure sign of stress. I wanted that stress, I even invited that stress as I saw it not as something negative, but a learning experience. Dedication is good, but I lost sight of other things. I did not know how to enjoy a moment anymore with my mind being corrupted by thoughts of the next thing to do.

I went to a café and had a coffee and a book. No memo pad, no laptop, only me, that book and a coffee.

I forced myself to take that pause and it was hard.

When did I unlearn to pause?! I remember my long sessions of writing diary in cafés during my uni years. My diary has been outdated for three years... I'm still in the process of pinpointing that problem. I'm on it.

Day One

I arrived back home on friday. The rush of too many things happening at the same time left me no space to think and process what just happened - result: I was completely knocked out on sunday. The rush of seeing old friends after two years of separation, good byes, surprising hellos to a lot of people, tattoos, flights, younameit... this was a lot to digest.

And yes, home. I get this fuzzy feeling thinking about this word. And I feel really good to call Berlin - more specifically the people around me - my home. I mentioned it here that I had this very good feeling about moving in with these people. It was a long process: I never wanted to settle for Berlin, I was restless because somewhere in my heart I had this feeling that I will "end up" here, so I tried my best to avoid calling it home again for a long time. And it was worth it. I am free to roam around the way I like and have this wonderful spot to call home. And I love it with all its imperfections, that's what it is about: accepting it for what it is and loving it.

Hello, it's good to be back.

Day One - again.

So I was back in Berlin. Shit happens. It pulled me down, I'm up again and happy to be back in Istanbul.

It is nice to exit the airport and to know what to do, where to go and not feeling completely lost. Rice with chick peas and a eggplant sauce later and I am so excited to get this adventure started! There are coffee and tea meetings, climbing, working, exploring to be done, helllooooo Istanbul! It was also nice to be back in Berlin - kinda. I loved coming home, squeezing into whatever room is empty (sorry guys for the inconvenience) knowing that I can always come back. Good talk in the kitchen, a barbecue party and the epic strawberry annihilation of 2015.

What I lost:
Too much money for going back and forth.

What I gave:
Too much trouble on the people around me :(

What I learned:
I though I was good at preparations. Hm, no. So much learning! I just discovered that I have THREE erasers with me! Where did they come from??

Hyper hyper

The usual panic arrived. So much to do, so little time. And sleep is overrated anyway.
I started counting hours, not days, because what do you need days for, if all that matters are the hours until the flight is going and you can sleep on the plane?

Catch me if you can while I still jump around the city :)


Blinding winter sun

Day One

"We're two couples of best friends moving in together."

The line that sold us to the lady that decides everything. Coordinating a move from three different locations sure is a challenge, but here we are. Breakfast on a moving box, no fridge yet, but cushions on the floor and the radio on with a overly happy morning radio show. This is the beginning of something new. I feel really lucky to have these people in my life and above that to move in with them! I know that the coming years will be full of adventure, full of travel, but we will have this anchor, where we can always return to. And knowing that is something incredible. With all my restlessness, I can count on this place and the people in it.

It feels like family. We are honest, we do crazy stuff, we get angry at each other. And then you get a text saying "What about pasta, I think it's time for a meal together"

I'm a cyborg, but that's okay

As an ex Shadow Run player, I am happy to say that there is at least 5% cyberware in my body. 14 different screws hold my ankle together. As an dancing loving, super-fast-running-cycling-and-jumping around person, I feel disabled. The mind is a very tricky thing. I think, I can do stuff, I want to do stuff and I am really trying to do stuff, but my body just doesn't let me. This has nothing to do with overestimating myself, but rather me not knowing how to deal with a serious injury like this. Serious, you say? I know, I'm neither terminally ill nor do I have a serious condition, but getting you leg cut open, put a lot of screws in it and sown up with lots of stitches is also nothing that heals in one day. I have to learn patience.

And this is where it gets tricky. I am very fortunate to be able to work from home, so I have some distraction during the day. I get a lot of friends visiting, a cat that loves to play on my bed and the best room mates you can wish for. I enjoy my time at home. It's the perfect excuse to watch the-movie-i-always-wanted-to-see-but-never-found-time-for-it and read a book or just do random stuff on my computer. But then the Blues hit me last weekend. Aaaah, I wanted to get out, I wanted to meet up with friends, I wanted to drop by a friend's place or just chill in the nearby park. I love my flat and I love staying at home, because I feel comfortable. But I also love COMING home. Being limited to my bed, the toilet and the kitchen and knowing even if you want to simply CANNOT get very far, was really getting on my mind. But then I realised, I can do about 250m on crutches before it starts getting uncomfortable. I can carry around stuff, because I always have a bag with me - not including cups with liquid in it or plates with food. I can use crutches to pull stuff closer or push away. I can do a spin to put something from A to B. I can balance on one foot, wrap my broken foot around the laundry stand and put up laundry. And I can ask people to do stuff for me and people in general are super helpful.

There are good days and there are bad days, but generally speaking this whole thing has taught me a lot. Not just about how to deal with myself in situations like this, accepting help or learning about the generosity of people. It is a healing process, I rediscover my body, but almost most importantly I learned that there will always be a way. You must be creative. It may take more time and won't look as smooth as usual. That put into the context of being a nomad, I will start the adventure of traveling to the south of Germany. I will do this in two different ways and am very excited, how it will all work out. So far, I have to put a lot more thought into preparation and cannot be as flexible as usual, so we will see how enjoyable, comfortable and "adventurous" this trip will be.

Day One

My first night back in my own bed after a special kind of get away from home - the hospital. Pure bliss of lying between my own cushions, having sweet Leonie (the cat) sitting on the piano and purring. Suddenly, you are on your own again, there is no bell to ring for a nurse, if you're in pain and no constant treatment. I have to handle my way through the narrow hallway on crutches and somehow get the milk out of the fridge, into my coffee and back again single-handedly. Still, I've never missed this place so much before.

"Inclusion of minorities of any kind" has been a quite an important topic, that's why this home coming is a special one. Every time I get home, I am altered, changed and full of new experiences. This time my physical alteration has been so great, I have to completely re-structure my routine at home. This is new. Home has always been a place, where you can move around with ease, where you can relaxe, because everything is familiar. On crutches, I discover that the bathroom door is awfully narrow, there are conveniently lots of areas to put stuff for a second between fridge and oven, there are too many shoes in the hallways and why is our apartment on the fourth floor?! Six weeks of living at home a different way ahead of me, oh my...

day one

a roof top - a beer - the warm hug of friends - the view of berlin

A day's journey takes you back to what you left behind. A day spent listening to safety instructions, waiting, bad airplane food and again waiting. Thousands of miles traveled and everything seems so far away. Is it really just a week ago that I went to bargain on an alpaca sweater in La Paz and lived in a dorm room?

I was restless the first day. And the second. Everything seemed so familiar and still, I stepped into my apartment and had to rediscover it. Was the kitchen always that big? Is there a new picture on the wall? Oh, and the outdated cleaning plan! I did not want to stop and let everything sink in. After a while I became very melancholic and longed for those simple times during traveling. I found myself falling back into old patterns today and have to remind myself of the incredible lightness I felt during traveling. Hello Berlin, it's nice to be back, but let me long for far far away places a little bit longer ♥

Places in Polaroid #3

#3 Berlin

A stroll through the city. Taking a look at things twice, appearing and fading away.

Hello 2013

Lots of steam!!

Where are all the posts I wanted to write? Gone. So gone like my travel plans. still the same city, still kinda lost. but after a crappy 2012, this year is going to be better. so here's to change: more posts!


... she claims and hopefully will not be reminded, if she fails.

In Search of Main

Among all those checklists in my room, organizer or laptop, this one is by far the most important and most satisfying one. Room - check! After a long time of procrastinating and trying to avoid the important things right now, getting a room yesterday was giving me back my energy and drive to do things! Yesssssss, here's my motivation again! Happy planning for the next weeks ♥

All Good Things Come To An End

a chapter ended.

the last week was a crazy haze of organizing and packing my stuff, handling business, meeting people for the last time and grabbing some sleep in between. by the time it was sunday, the apartment was as good as new, my belongings were on their way to berlin and i even managed to attend a friend's farewell party. but as i woke up on sunday at 6:30am with only three hours of sleep i found a place that was stripped bare of all its charme. it was still a beautiful place, but so damn empty. i walked into my room, hearing every step so hollowly and finally saw that spot, where i messed up painting the wall three years ago. still smells like my room, has my trace, but will never be my room again.

so sunday.
arabella and i got on this journey with hell yeah too much stuff. i intended to take a picture of her at every stop we took (there were THREE), but duly noted Deutsche Bahn again provided a wonderful service, so that either i had to pull her the platform all the way up and the next one back again or the doors were way too narrow or just to high to lift her into the train. not to forget the device i had to put her into, aaaaaah! luckily, bike travelers are a nice kind of folks. back in ludwigshafen i often took my bike to work in heidelberg using local trains and never had any trouble, so i was quite surprised by all these obstacles. by the time i was in the train i was just glad i did it and totally forgot about the pictures.

24h into living in my room, i am still hung up about the wonderful time that ended. even if i had tried to extend it, it wouldn't have been the same with most of my friends gone and yes, everything is new and exciting, but i am allowed to yearn a bit for those days, right? at least a little bit more ;) so i hung up the cat i got from a very good friend from japan that was also in my old room. and it feels better. i enter my new room (which by the way is quite awesome, but more on that later) and feel a little bit at home. this is getting better.

one step closer

sometimes things just work out :)
a friend of mine is going abroad and leaves his room available in berlin for the summer. i just asked him out of curiosity, if i could have it and voilà, i have a room in berlin! a good time to write my graduation paper, time to find some exciting activities in berlin, time to plan my trip and yeah, somehow it is the trial before the big show. my first "stop" on this journey.

beahnomad in berlin for two months, wahey ♥

Home is where my heart is

my little sister had her prom last weekend. she looked all fancy, pretty and awesome with her boyfriend. i think, my little sister is not so little anymore. she's all grown-up and going far far away.

so i took a nine hour ride (NOT normal) from the south of germany to berlin to see her graduate. when i got out and waited on the track of some random train station i've never been before, i took a deep breath and... and... felt at home. the people! the cool breeze that i only feel in berlin! the busy atmosphere! but still somehow relaxed! and especially the messy subways, this is where i feel i belong to. this is where i grew up, where i took the bus/subway/train/bike to school, loved and hated it every second. everyone tells me what an awesome city berlin is and i appreciate it since i know not only the super cool party hard and long side of berlin, but also the exciting feeling i had when i was twelve taking the bus to school every day.

thinking of home, i can name three places:
berlin, nagoya, ludwigshafen.

i am lucky to can call these places home, because whenever i visit one of these cities, there is someone welcoming home. my real family, my host family, my study family. it is this feeling that you love them unconditionally even if they are dirty, not pretty and not the most exciting place in the world. i had the great opportunity to live, work and learn to love these places and despite feeling at home i realized one thing:

i love traveling. i hate being forced to stay in one place the whole time, i just want to go out there and discover new worlds! traveling is purely awesome, but whenever i had to move to a new town and live there, i learned the most about the culture, myself and my own country. well, that is what i want to do! and that is how i decided to become a nomad.